I have an angry parent on my case. Her son has come unprepared everyday to band. He doesn't bring his drumsticks. At the beginning of the year, I sent a letter home to parents instructing what sticks they needed to buy. When her son got a low grade on his progress report, then the emails started flying. After I told her that he was unprepared, she tried to convince me that her son really does love band and practices everyday. (p.s. this student doesn't even like to stand up to play like he is supposed to). He hasn't turned in a single practice log. After a recent email exchange, I get a pile of practice logs from his mom FILLED OUT BY HER!! So... parents are doing their kids' homework now?!?!? You've got to be kidding me! Now she emails me saying that shes been to every music store in the county and no one has drumsticks. Uhhhhhhhhhhhh. AND she wrote in ANGRY RED TEXT! Well, only the angry sentences were red. I'm embarrassed for her.
Why are parents so ridiculous? Teach your child to take responsibility!! If you can't get him to fill out a worksheet, how will he ever hold down a serious job??
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4 comments:
Remove him from the class. It is obvious he is not interested. Have the school stick him in study hall if you have one. It isn't fair to the other students who want to learn to have this yahoo in there taking up your time. Get rid of him or he may end up causing you more problems than you need.
This kind of thing just boggles my mind.These poor kids have been enabled by their parents. How on Earth will they navigate for themselves when they are adults? Answer: By making excuses like their parents!
I can really relate to this. I had a parent this year let her son stay home from school for TWO WEEKS because middle school was "too stressful" for him. She then came to school with him and literally attended all his classes. Sitting next to him. It was the most ridiculous thing I've ever seen.
Or what about the girl who punched my chalkboard!? I called her mother and she asked me not to punish her because it was her birthday. I'm sorry, WHAT!?
Have you stopped to think that maybe the mother has a point?
Maybe you shouldn't be assigning grades based solely on responsibility? He's a middle school boy. Maybe part of the nature of being a middle school boy is that you forget to turn in homework.
Check his other classes. I would expect that he DOES his homework in his other classes but doesn't turn it in and has a collection of zeros in those classes as well.
When I had practice records, I made it a point to count them for ONLY 10% of the grade. The point of the practice records is to get them to practice. Any more weight on them and we punish irresponsibility and encourage lying.
If he loves band, don't kick him out! Even if he hates band, don't kick him out. As long as he is not keeping other students from learning, let him be in there so that he can learn to enjoy music.
How to solve the problems...
Have you considered asking if it's a financial issue with the sticks? You'd be surprised, it probably is and she is making excuses so she doesn't have to admit it.
What I would do (what I do) is buy a set of SD1 General sticks that I use in percussion class. Whenever someone forgets their sticks (I deal with middle school kids, they forget stuff all the time), let them borrow my sticks.
Of course we want the students to take responsibility, but you've discovered that the mother is more interested in blaming someone else than she is in accepting responsibility for her mistakes. Why would the son be any different? Give him a break and give him a chance! :)
Joel:
You do have a good point. The boy is in high school, however, which is why we expect them to buy their own sticks. I do have a spare set in my classroom that he has been using. My practice logs only count towards 15% of his final grade. While I do read them, I just check off that they have been turned in.
I would never kick anyone out of band. Unfortuantely I think that he is getting pressure from school and from his mother and he wants no part of either. Now that I've calmed down, this is much clearer. We'll see where this goes...
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